2002-01-18
6:44 p.m.

"In my blood like holy wine, you taste so bitter and so sweet. Well, I could drink a case of you, darling, and I would still be on my feet."
~Joni Mitchell, A Case Of You

The past few days have been pretty good. Howie finally e-mailed me and gave me his address. I'll send him the pictures from my birthday.

My favorite part of the week was when John walked in to the career center and said to me and Victoria, "You know what? I really like you guys!"

Victoria and I debated the quote, "I think, therefore, I am." It made me feel good when Victoria said I had put into words exactly what she was thinking.

A little bit later in the day, Wendy and Marc came in. Marc said he was looking for a used graphing calculator to buy, and I said I had one. I thought I was going to get some extra cash, but then Wendy interjected, and said that Marc could just give me a free massage. (He's a masseuse). Though I desperately want/need one, I am a little squeamish about a guy doing it. The only guy I would ever really want to touch me would be Howie, and that ain't gonna happen. So what should I do? Should I just suck it up, and take the massage, or should I back out? I'm sure it will be nice, and I really do need one, like I said, but I'm still not sure. Oh well, we shall see....

I still miss Howie, though I haven't cried in a few days at least. The pain has subsided to more of a dull ache in my chest rather than a searing pain, so I guess that's something.

I went to the west campus with Katie and Audery to help with the ACE Program orientation. It was pretty good, though I was dead tired, and after we registered everybody there wasn't much for us to do. But on the way home, Katie said that even though I do get hyper and wild sometimes, I have a kindness about me, and people probably really enjoy talking to me. That made my night!

Earlier in the day, I talked to Heather, and it was nice. Though she's having family problems, it was good to know that I could help her by listening. I told her what Wenday did, and she said she wished she could have been there to stick up for me.

Today, I saw Bryn, walked with her to her mom's work, and took the bus to the station with her. She's really sweet, and I'm really very glad she and Brian love each other so much. They deserve to be happy.

My classes are good. I think they will be interesting, and that I'll like them all, so no worries there, thank goodness.

Not much else to report. I suppose I'll go eat now.