2002-03-18
2:09 p.m.

On Thursday, Sathya and I saw "The Royal Tenenbaums" and then Sathya stayed for dinner. On Friday, I was sitting at the bus stop, and Caitlin drives up. I hadn't seen her for months. She asked me if I wanted a ride, so we went to Bookman's, and then to Quebeck café for coffee. Caitlin ran into her friend Ayla from high school, and we hung out with them for quite awhile. It was quite wonderful. Then, Caitlin and I went to see her friend Mike. When he opened the door to his apartment, I realized I knew him from high school. After visiting with Mike for awhile, we picked up Caitlin's boyfriend Tyler from work. We then set off for Ayla's, but when we got there, she wasn't home. Caitlin and Tyler were getting really tired at this point, so Caitlin drove me home.

But that was just a retelling of events, not what I really want to write about. As I touched upon briefly in one of my last entries, I have been feeling utterly shitty about myself. I can't articulate myself; the words just get caught in my throat, and my head feels completely empty. I don't feel like I know enough, I don't feel like I'm doing anything right. My critical voice is louder than it ever has been, maybe in my entire life, and I don't know how to break free.